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Do you have problems controlling your anger? Everyone gets angry, but frequent outbursts and difficulty in controlling oneself may signal an aggression problem. Our therapists can help you take control!

What are aggression problems?

Anger problems are characterised by difficulties in managing anger and aggression in a healthy way. This can manifest itself in explosive outbursts, constant irritability, or a tendency to react with violence or threats. It is important to understand that aggression problems affect not only the individual, but also their loved ones.

Causes of aggression problems in adults

There are many factors that can contribute to aggression problems in adults, including:

  • Psychological factors: Stress, anxiety, or unresolved trauma.
  • Biological factors: Imbalances in brain chemistry or hormones.
  • Social factors : Conflict in relationships or in the workplace.

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Aggression problems in adults: signs and symptoms

Recognising the signs of aggression problems is the first step towards seeking help. Common signs include:

  • Frequent outbursts of anger.
  • Difficulty controlling one’s temper.
  • Physical violence or threats of violence
  • Destructive behaviour towards oneself or others.

Dealing with aggression problems: First steps

Dealing with aggression problems requires a conscious effort and often a change in how we relate to our emotions and environment. The first step in this journey is self-awareness – recognising and accepting you have a problem. This is the key to breaking negative behavioural patterns. Start by observing the situations and emotions that trigger aggressive behaviour. Is it stress at work, family conflicts, or perhaps feelings of inadequacy? By identifying these triggers, you can start working on reducing their impact. Practicing being aware of your emotions in the moment can give you the necessary time to choose a healthier response.

Physical activity

Physical activity is another important part of managing aggression. Exercise releases endorphins, which are natural mood enhancers, and helps reduce tension and stress. Finding a form of physical activity that you enjoy can be an effective way to manage aggressive impulses.

Seek support

In addition to these self-help methods, it is also important to seek support. Talking to friends or family members about your challenges can be liberating and help you feel less isolated. It can also provide a new perspective on your problems and offer new solutions.


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Consider talking to a psychologist

If you feel that your aggression problems are overwhelming and affecting your daily life and relationships, you should consider seeking professional help. A psychologist can give you tools and strategies to effectively manage your anger and work towards a more balanced and harmonious life. Remember, seeking help is a sign of strength, not weakness. Taking care of your mental health is as important as taking care of your physical health.

When to seek professional help for aggression problems?

If your aggression problems are affecting your daily life or relationships, it is important to seek professional help. A psychologist can offer strategies to manage anger and work on underlying causes.

How a psychologist can help

When it comes to aggression issues, a psychologist can be a valuable resource for understanding and managing these challenges effectively. Through individualised therapy sessions, the psychologist works with the client to explore the underlying causes of aggressive behaviour, which often includes reviewing past experiences, current stressors, and personal triggers. A key focus is on developing self-awareness and insight, which is essential for managing and changing destructive behavioural patterns.


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CBT for aggression problems

A key method used is cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT), as it helps individuals identify and transform negative thought patterns that contribute to anger and aggression. Through CBT, the client learns to challenge and change irrational thoughts and beliefs, leading to more positive behavioural changes. In addition, the psychologist may incorporate other therapeutic strategies such as mindfulness and relaxation techniques, that are effective in reducing stress and increasing emotional control.

Communication and conflict management

Psychologists can also work on improving communication skills and conflict management, which is particularly valuable for individuals struggling with aggression issues. Learning to express their emotions in a healthy and constructive way can reduce the frequency and intensity of aggressive outbursts. For some, group therapy can also be beneficial, as it provides an opportunity to learn from and share experiences with others facing similar challenges.

Psychotropic medication for aggression problems

If necessary, the psychologist can work with other healthcare providers, such as psychiatrists, to evaluate the need for medication, especially if there are signs of underlying mental health conditions that are contributing to the aggression problems.

Professional guidance

In summary, psychologists offer a wide range of tools and strategies to help individuals with aggression problems. Their expertise can guide individuals towards a more peaceful and controlled existence, equipping them with the necessary skills to manage anger and aggression in a healthy way. Seeking help from a psychologist is a courageous and decisive step towards regaining control over your own behaviour and life.

We help you to overcome your aggression

Lavendla lets you connect with experienced psychologists who specialise in aggression issues. Whether you are struggling with your own mood or dealing with someone else’s aggression issues, we are here to help. Are you ready to take the next step toward a more harmonious life? Book an online session with one of our psychologists through their profile pages on our website.


20 common questions about aggression problems

How do you know if you have an aggression problem?

Aggression problems are often characterised by a tendency to react with anger or frustration in situations where it is not appropriate. Symptoms can include physical expressions such as fighting, shouting or throwing things, as well as psychological signs such as feelings of anger and frustration that feel difficult to control. If these reactions are recurrent and harm your daily life, they may be signs of an aggression problem.

What are aggression problems?

An aggression problem is a pattern of behaviour where a person regularly displays anger or aggressive behaviour. This can include both physical and verbal expressions of anger, such as shouting, swearing, hitting, or threatening. These problems can have different causes, such as stress, mental health conditions, or childhood experiences.

What can be done about aggression problems?

To deal with aggression problems, it is important to first of all seek professional help, such as therapy or counselling. Other strategies include stress management techniques, mindfulness, and developing effective communication skills. Physical activity and hobbies that promote relaxation can also be helpful.

How to deal with a person with aggression problems?

When dealing with a person with aggression problems, it is important to remain calm and avoid confrontation. Listen actively and show understanding of the person’s feelings. Set clear boundaries and avoid provoking or escalating the situation. If the situation becomes threatening, prioritise your own safety and seek help if necessary.

What are the long-term effects of untreated aggression problems?

Untreated aggression problems can lead to a range of negative consequences, such as impaired relationships, work-related problems, and legal consequences. Psychologically, it can lead to increased stress, anxiety and depression. It is therefore important to seek help early to manage and treat aggression problems.

Are there different types of aggression problems?

Yes, there are different types of aggression problems. They can be categorised as impulsive aggression, where aggressive actions occur spontaneously and often in response to a provocative event, and instrumental aggression, where aggressive behaviour is more calculated and used to achieve a specific goal. Each type requires different treatment methods.

How do aggression problems affect relationships?

Aggression problems can negatively affect relationships, as they often lead to conflict and misunderstandings. It can make it difficult to maintain close relationships and create a sense of insecurity and fear in loved ones. Working on managing one’s aggression is therefore important for maintaining and improving relationships.

What role does communication play in managing aggression problems?

Effective communication is central to the management of aggression problems. It involves learning to express your feelings in a healthy way, listening actively and showing empathy. Improving communication skills can prevent misunderstandings and reduce the frequency of aggressive outbursts.

Can lifestyle changes help manage aggression problems?

Yes, lifestyle changes can play an important role in managing aggression problems. Regulated sleep, a balanced diet, regular physical activity and avoiding substance abuse can help improve mood control and reduce aggression. Developing healthy coping strategies for stress is also essential.

Are aggression problems linked to other mental health conditions?

Aggression problems can sometimes be linked to other mental health conditions such as depression, anxiety disorders, PTSD, and some personality disorders. It is important to seek professional help to determine if there is an underlying cause for the aggression and to get an appropriate treatment plan.

Can children have aggression problems?

Yes, children can also experience aggression problems. It can manifest itself through outbursts, defiance, or physically aggressive actions. It is important to seek help to understand the reasons behind the child’s behaviour and teach them how to manage their emotions in a healthy way.

What role does self-awareness play in dealing with aggression problems?

Self-awareness is crucial in dealing with aggression problems. Recognising signs of rising irritation or anger provides an opportunity to manage these feelings before they escalate into aggressive behaviour. This may involve taking a break, using relaxation techniques, or seeking support.

Is medication an option for treating aggression problems?

In some cases, medication can be used as part of the treatment for aggression problems, especially when they are linked to other mental health conditions. Medication can help regulate mood and reduce the incidence of aggressive outbursts. However, this should always be done in consultation with a doctor.

Are there preventive measures to reduce the risk of aggression problems?

Preventive measures include developing healthy coping strategies for stress, maintaining a balanced lifestyle, and seeking help at the first signs of problematic behavior. Learning effective communication skills and self-regulation techniques is also important in preventing aggression.

How can workplaces support employees with aggression problems?

Workplaces can play an important role by offering support to employees with aggression problems. This can include access to psychological counselling, flexible working hours, a supportive work environment, and training for employees on how to deal with conflict constructively.

Are there community resources or support groups for people with aggression problems?

Community resources and support groups are available for people with aggression problems. These resources include therapeutic programmes, self-help groups, and online forums. Groups can provide support and strategies for coping with aggression, also a sense of community.

Can physical activity help reduce aggression problems?

Yes, regular physical activity can be effective in reducing symptoms of aggression. Exercise releases endorphins, which contribute to improved mood and stress management. Activities such as yoga and mindfulness-based exercise can be particularly helpful in increasing self-awareness and control over emotional reactions.

How do alcohol and drugs affect aggression problems?

Alcohol and drugs can make aggression problems worse by reducing self-control and the ability to assess situations correctly. These substances can lead to increased impulsivity and aggressive behaviour, and should be avoided by people who struggle with aggression.

Are aggression problems hereditary?

There are some indications that genetic factors may play a role in the development of aggression problems, but the environment and individual experiences are also very significant. A combination of genetic, psychological and social factors contribute to the development and management of aggression problems.

How can you distinguish between normal anger and an aggression problem?

Normal anger is a natural and healthy emotional response to certain situations and tends to be proportionate to the cause. Anger problems are characterised by excessive or unreasonable anger that is difficult to control, leads to destructive behaviour, and negatively affects the person’s life.

Can mindfulness and meditation be effective in dealing with aggression problems?

Yes, mindfulness and meditation have been shown to be effective methods for dealing with aggression problems. These techniques help increase self-awareness, reduce stress, and improve emotional regulation. Through regular practice, individuals can learn to identify and manage triggers for aggression in a more constructive way.

How can you support a friend or family member with aggression problems?

Supporting someone with an aggression problem requires patience, understanding, and empathy. It is important to listen without judgement and offer support to seek professional help. Encourage healthy ways to manage stress and be a positive influence by modelling healthy behaviours and communication methods. Remember to take care of your emotional well-being in the process.

Managing aggression problems: A step-by-step guide

Dealing with anger issues is a challenge that requires patience and understanding. Below is a list of steps that can help you start the process, either to deal with your own aggression or to support someone else.

1: Recognise the problem

  • Identify the feelings: Recognise when you feel anger or aggression and what triggers these feelings.
  • Acceptance: Accept that it is normal to feel anger, but important to manage it in a healthy way.

2: Seek professional help

  • Contact a therapist: Consider talking to a psychologist or therapist who specialises in anger management.
  • Emergencies: If the aggression leads to violence or self-harm, 111 or 999 immediately.

3: Developing self-awareness

  • Journaling: Keeping a diary of situations that trigger aggression can help you identify patterns.
  • Self-reflection: Reflect on your reactions and what is behind them.

4: Learn coping techniques

  • Breathing techniques: Use deep breathing to calm down in moments of anger.
  • Relaxation techniques: Try techniques such as meditation or yoga to reduce stress levels.

5: Improve communication

  • Expressing emotions: Learn to express your emotions in a constructive way without becoming aggressive.
  • Active listening: Listen to others and try to understand their point of view.

6: Create a positive environment

  • Supportive networks: Surround yourself with people who support your efforts to deal with aggression.
  • Avoid triggers: Identify and avoid situations that tend to trigger your anger.

7: Create an action plan

  • Goals and strategies: Set realistic goals for managing your anger and develop strategies for dealing with challenging situations.
  • Evaluate and adjust: Regularly evaluate your success and adjust your plan if necessary.

8: Continue with self-development

  • Long-term goals: Continue to work on understanding and controlling your aggression.
  • Lifestyle changes: Make healthy lifestyle changes that can reduce stress and promote well-being.

Lavendla helps make the difficult easier. Dealing with aggression is a journey, and it’s okay to seek help along the way. These steps are a start, with the right support and commitment, it is possible to achieve a more balanced and healthy management of aggression.


Written by Dominic Wardall

Dominic is a Cape Town-based copywriter and editor with extensive background and studies in psychology. Dominic is a central part of the articles written on Lavendla.