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Some babies may need more attention, comfort and engagement than others. They are sometimes called 'high need babies' and here we explain what this means and what you can do as a parent.
The term ‘high need baby’ refers to babies who show a more intense level of need than average. These children may require more attention, comfort and involvement from their parents or caregivers. Characteristics often associated with high need babies include:
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The concept of high need babies was popularized by Dr. William Sears, an American pediatrician, who observed that some children seem to have a higher need for physical closeness and attention in order to feel safe and content. It is important to note that these characteristics are not medical diagnoses but rather a way to describe a pattern of behavior that requires more parental support and adaptation.
Parenting a high need baby can be demanding and exhausting, but there are strategies and approaches that can make life easier and strengthen the bond between you and your child. Here are some tips:
Accepting that your child has higher needs than others can help you adjust your expectations and find the patience needed to meet those needs with understanding and love.
Physical closeness, such as hugs, skin-to-skin contact and wearing a baby carrier or sling, can provide comfort and security to your high need child. This can also strengthen your bond.
While routines are important for all children, high need babies may require more flexibility. Be ready to adapt schedules based on your child’s signals and needs.
Different babies are calmed in different ways. Experiment with rocking, singing, soothing sounds or quiet walks to see what works best for your baby.
Sleep deprivation is common for parents of high need babies. Try to rest when your baby rests and ask for help to take short breaks to recover.
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Minimize other sources of stress in your life as much as possible. This may mean asking for help from family and friends, lowering expectations for household chores or taking a break from social commitments.
Finding a community or support group with other parents of high need babies can be invaluable. Sharing experiences and getting support from those who understand can make a big difference.
Don’t forget about your own wellbeing. Eating healthily, exercising and giving yourself mental rest are essential to being the parent your child needs.
If you feel overwhelmed, don’t hesitate to seek professional help. A pediatrician, $1 or a family counselor can offer valuable support and advice.
Parenting a high need baby is challenging, but it is also an opportunity to build a deep and meaningful relationship with your child. Through patience, love and the right support, you can navigate this unique journey.
Parenting a high-needs baby can be challenging, but seeking help is an important step in dealing with these challenges effectively. Turning to a pediatrician, child psychologist, support groups, or family and friends can provide necessary resources and relief.
For children under 6 years old, the Child Health Center (BVC) can help. These sources of support offer different perspectives and coping strategies, which are crucial for the well-being of both the child and the parents.
Opening up for help is not a sign of weakness but a strong measure to ensure that both you and your child get the support you need. Remember, your own health is just as important, and taking care of yourself will help you be the parent your high need child needs. Seeking help from a child psychologist is an important step when a child is experiencing mental health difficulties. Feel free to consult one of our child psychologists at Lavendla if needed.
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The term high need baby refers to babies who show a more intense level of need than average. These babies may require more attention, comfort and involvement from their parents or caregivers.
High need babies require more closeness and may have difficulties with sleep, show strong reactions, need frequent breastfeeding or feeding, are difficult to learn and are extra sensitive to their environment.
The concept of high need babies was popularized by Dr. William Sears, an American pediatrician, who observed that some children seem to have a higher need for physical closeness and attention in order to feel safe and content.
It is important to note that these characteristics are not medical diagnoses but rather a way to describe a pattern of behavior that requires more parental support and adaptation.
Parenting a high need baby requires patience and creativity, with strategies such as accepting the child’s needs, creating physical proximity, flexible routines, learning calming techniques, prioritizing sleep, simplifying life, seeking support, self-care, and sometimes professional help to make life easier and strengthen the relationship with your child.
Babies usually sleep between 15 to 18 hours per day in the first few months, but sleep patterns can vary, with periods of sleep ranging from a few minutes to several hours at a time.
If an infant is crying, it may help to gently rock the baby, offer food, check the diaper, or create a calming environment. It is also important to check if the baby needs comforting or has other immediate needs that need to be met, but also to ask for help if necessary.
A child psychologist is a licensed professional with knowledge and experience in working for the well-being and mental health of children and parents.
A child psychologist offers therapy and counseling, but also works with families in parental support and the whole family when needed. They also work with schools to create good conditions for the child.
It is possible to see a child psychologist privately. At Lavendla we have several psychologists who have extensive experience of working with children and young people.
It is possible to have a treatment online via video. We have several child psychologists who work digitally at Lavendla.
For children under the age of 6, the Barnavårdscentralen can help. At Lavendla, we have experienced child psychologists who are available.
Seeking help from a child psychologist is an important step when a child is experiencing psychological difficulties or if you are having difficulties as a parent. Here is a brief overview of what treatment can look like:
First step: Initial consultation where the psychologist assesses needs through discussions with parents.
Types of therapy: Common methods include cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), which focuses on changing negative thought patterns and behaviors. Other methods such as family therapy can also be helpful. Treatment may also include parental counseling where parents receive guidance and support to better help their child at home.
Monitoring and adjustment: The treatment plan is continuously evaluated and adjusted as needed to ensure the best possible outcome.
It is important to remember that each child is unique, and therefore treatment may vary. Working together with a child psychologist can give you and your child the tools they need to manage their emotions and behaviors in a healthy way. At Lavendla, we have child psychologists who can help make the hard stuff easier.