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Low self-esteem can impact children's relationships, school performance, and overall satisfaction with life. Here we look at what self-esteem is, how to identify low self-esteem and what can be done to improve self-esteem in children.
What is self-esteem?
Self-esteem reflects how we perceive and value ourselves. In children, this self-image is particularly malleable and is influenced by a variety of factors, from family dynamics to interactions at school. Positive self-esteem is the foundation of a healthy mental state, while low self-esteem can lead to a range of negative consequences, both psychologically and socially.
Why is it important?
For children who are faced with the challenge of understanding themselves and the world around them, strong self-esteem is like armor for the trials of life. It affects everything from academic performance to social skills and the ability to cope with adversity. However, a child who struggles with low self-esteem can experience anxiety, depression and even social isolation.
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With enough support, children with low self-esteem can learn to see their own values and strengths. This is where parents, teachers and other adults in a child’s life play a crucial role.
Symptoms of low self-esteem in children
Recognizing the signs of low self-esteem in children is important to provide the right support. Here is an overview of common symptoms:
- Negative self-image: The child sees themselves in a negative light and does not feel as good as others.
- Challenge avoidance: Fear of failure causes children to avoid new things.
- Social withdrawal: They withdraw from others to avoid criticism or rejection.
- Sensitivity to criticism: Even mild criticism is taken hard and can lead to strong reactions.
- Perfectionism: The child places unreasonable demands on themselves, which creates frustration.
- Low frustration threshold: Easily frustrated or upset, especially when challenged.
- Self-criticism: The child is hard on themselves for small mistakes or things they can’t control.
- Fear of new experiences: Because of the fear of failure, they stick to familiar activities.
- Feelings of hopelessness: Sometimes they may express a feeling that there is no hope for improvement.
If you notice these signs in a child, it may be a good idea to seek professional help to give them the support they need.
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Self-esteem in children of different ages
Supporting children’s self-esteem is important throughout their developmental stages. Here is a brief overview of how self-esteem develops from childhood to adolescence.
Early childhood (0-5 years)
Children explore and begin to know themselves. Positive feedback and encouragement are key to building self-confidence and security.
School age (6-12 years)
In school, children face new challenges. Self-esteem is linked to achievement and social context. Highlighting individual strengths helps children feel valuable.
Teenage years (13-19 years)
Adolescence is a time of identity search and physical changes. Self-esteem is strongly influenced by peers and social media. Open communication and support of independence is important.
Consistent support
Feeling loved and valued is fundamental to children’s self-esteem at any age. Being present and encouraging self-expression lays the foundation for a positive self-image and future.
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What can parents do to strengthen children’s self-esteem?
Parents can strengthen their children’s self-esteem by offering unconditional love, praising efforts rather than just results, actively listening to their thoughts and feelings, encouraging independence, and modeling positive self-image and problem-solving skills. Through these actions, they create a secure foundation on which children can grow and develop a strong sense of self-worth.
Treatment with a child therapist
Seeking help from a child therapist is an important step when a child is experiencing mental health difficulties. Lavendla has many child therapists who can help determine the causes of low self-esteem and develop a plan to improve it.
Treatment with a child therapist is adapted to the child’s individual needs and may include methods such as talk therapy, play therapy, family therapy and group therapy. The aim is to improve the child’s emotional well-being and develop coping strategies. The child therapist works closely with the child, his or her family, and sometimes with the school to create a safe environment where the child can learn to manage emotions and behaviors effectively.
It is important to remember that each child is unique, so treatment may vary. Working with a child therapist can give your child the tools they need to manage their emotions and behaviors in a healthy way.
12 common questions about self-esteem in children
What is self-esteem?
Self-esteem reflects how we perceive and value ourselves. In children, this self-image is particularly malleable and is influenced by a variety of factors, from family dynamics to interactions at school.
Why is self-esteem important in children?
For children, who are faced with the challenge of understanding themselves and the world around them, strong self-esteem is like armor for the trials of life. It affects everything from academic performance to social skills and the ability to cope with adversity.
What are the symptoms of low self-esteem in children?
Identifying the signs of low self-esteem in children, such as negative self-image, avoidance of new challenges and social withdrawal, is crucial to provide them with appropriate support and assistance.
How does self-esteem develop in children at different ages?
Children’s self-esteem develops gradually from early childhood through the school years to adolescence, with each phase bringing new challenges and opportunities to support their growing self-image and independence.
What can parents do to boost children’s self-esteem?
Parents can strengthen their children’s self-esteem by offering unconditional love, praising effort rather than just results, actively listening to their thoughts and feelings, encouraging independence, and modeling positive self-image and problem-solving skills.
My child has a high need for affirmation, what can I do?
To meet a child’s high need for affirmation, it is important to give them consistent attention and recognition, while encouraging independence and helping them find strength and value within themselves.
Can children attend psychological treatment?
Yes, Lavendla has many specially trained child therapists with skills to communicate and help children of all ages.
What is CBT?
Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) is an evidence-based therapy that helps individuals identify and challenge negative thought patterns and behaviors that contribute to poor mental health.
What is a child therapist?
A child therapist is a licensed professional with knowledge and experience in promoting the well-being and mental health of children and parents.
How long is treatment with a child therapist?
The treatment is adapted to the presenting problems of the child and/or family. Treatment can last anywhere from a few sessions to several years.
Can I see a child therapist online?
Yes, all of Lavendla’s therapists offer virtual sessions via our secure video conferencing platform.
Where can I go if I or my child needs help from a child therapist?
Lavendla has numerous experienced child therapists who can help. Go ahead and search the profiles online to find a match!
How does treatment with a child therapist work?
Seeking help from a child therapist is an important step when a child is experiencing mental health problems or if you are having difficulties as a parent. Here is a brief overview of what treatment can look like:
First step: Initial consultation where the psychologist assesses needs through conversations with the child and parents.
Treatment plan: An individualized plan is developed based on the child’s specific situation and needs.
Types of therapy: Common approaches include play therapy for younger children, in which play is used as a tool for expression and processing, and talk therapy and cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) for older children, which focus on changing negative thought patterns and behaviors. Other methods such as family therapy can also be helpful.
Parental counseling: Parents receive guidance and support through meetings with the therapist to better help their child at home.
Monitoring and adjustment: The treatment plan is continuously evaluated and adjusted as needed to ensure the best possible outcome.
It is important to remember that each child is unique, and therefore treatment may vary. Working with a child therapist can give you and your child the tools they need to manage their emotions and behaviors in a healthy way. At Lavendla, we have child therapists who can help make the hard things easier.
