4,7 of 5 in 5000+ reviews
Thousands of clients trust Lavendla Therapy for delivering exceptional service and support.
Thinking about attending couples therapy can raise numerous questions and concerns. What will the experience be like? What can one expect during treatment? Does couples therapy work? Here, we address various queries that may arise regarding couple therapy.
What is couples therapy?
Couples therapy is psychotherapy that helps couples resolve conflicts, improve communication and strengthen their relationship. It is suitable for couples in all relationship types and focuses on addressing issues that affect the relationship’s health. In therapy, the couple works with the therapist to understand the core issues, improve communication, manage disagreements and strengthen their relationship.
This involves exploring the history of the relationship, improving the expression of thoughts and feelings, addressing specific problems such as finances or parenting, and developing conflict management strategies. Couples therapy is valuable during crises like infidelity or significant changes, and the goal is to help the couple understand what is best for them, whether that means staying together or separating healthily. Seeking couples therapy can be a decisive step towards revitalizing a relationship and building a stronger, more fulfilling future together.
Is couples therapy effective?
Couples therapy has proven effective for many couples facing challenges in their relationships. Effectiveness can vary depending on the therapy method used, the couple’s commitment to the process, the therapist’s skills and experience, and the nature of the problems or conflicts in the relationship. Research generally supports the effectiveness of couple therapy, with around 70% of couples experiencing improvements in their relationship after treatment.
What set our therapist apart was her genuine empathy and personal insight. Not only did she possess a deep understanding of neurodiversity, but she also shared personal experiences that resonated with us, creating an instant connection and fostering a sense of trust!
Benedetta Osarenk
Our counsellors
Click here to view all psychologists, therapists, and coaches.
How do you know when it is time to seek couple therapy?
Determining when it’s time to seek a couple’s therapy can be based on several signs: If you are experiencing constant communication problems, recurring conflicts without resolution, feel emotionally distant, or have trust issues, such as after infidelity, it may be time to consider professional help.
Other indications include difficulty coping with significant life changes, problems with sexual intimacy, disagreements over important life decisions, and thoughts of separation or divorce are becoming more frequent. Seeking couples therapy is a step towards taking care of and improving your relationship and demonstrates a commitment to working together to resolve problems.
Common questions asked in couples therapy
In couples therapy, questions are used to deepen understanding between partners and explore the relationship dynamics. Questions can relate to the current state of the relationship, the challenges faced, and what the couple hopes to achieve from therapy. Communication is often the focus, with questions about how the couple handles disagreements and whether there are topics they are avoiding. The therapist may also ask about feelings and needs, how love is expressed, and how conflicts are resolved. Discussions about changes in the relationship over time, wishes for the future, and intimacy and closeness are also crucial. These questions encourage honesty and reflection, help couples understand each other better, and work towards a stronger relationship.
Book a meeting
Fill in the form, choose a counsellor, and proceed to payment.
How does treatment for relationship problems work?
Couple therapy begins with the initial sessions, where the therapist gets to know the couple and their challenges, followed by setting joint goals to improve the relationship, such as better communication or conflict management. The work phase focuses on developing communication skills, resolving conflicts, working through emotional issues, solving problems and introducing positive behavioural changes, with active input from both partners. There are often exercises to work on between sessions. The process ends with an evaluation and a plan to maintain and improve the relationship in the future. Each session is about 60 minutes and can be weekly if necessary, but often every two or three weeks. The length of a couple’s therapy is customized but is usually around ten sessions.
What is the therapist’s role in therapy?
The therapist’s role is to guide and support the couple through the process, with the couple’s involvement being crucial to success. The therapist helps the couple to identify patterns and challenges and to work on different strategies to change communication and behaviours to make the relationship more satisfying. They share the floor and allow both parties to communicate openly to find solutions to problems. Couples therapy aims to provide insights and tools for a stronger and more satisfying relationship.
Are there different methods in couples therapy?
There are several different approaches to couple therapy. Here are two evidence-based approaches that are commonly used:
1. Integrative Behavioural Therapy for Couples (IBCT)
IBCT aims to help couples accept their irreconcilable differences and work on increasing closeness and understanding. This can be done by improving emotional acceptance and empathic communication. The method combines behavioural changes with acceptance strategies. It is an evidence-based approach, meaning that it has been shown to produce good results in research, and it is a further development of cognitive behavioural therapy for couples.
2. Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT)
EFT is a method that focuses on strengthening the emotional bond between partners by exploring the emotional responses that underlie the couple’s interaction patterns. The therapy helps couples identify and express their underlying emotional needs and learn to meet each other’s needs more satisfyingly. EFT is an evidence-based approach that has been shown to produce good research results.
Each method has strengths and may be more or less appropriate depending on the couple’s specific situation and needs. Other techniques, such as the Gottman Method and literature, can help couples gain insight into their relationship. Many couple therapists use these methods to address the couple’s unique challenges best.
Why Lavendla?
Choose your own counsellor
Browse and select a counsellor based on reviews, area of focus, and education, ensuring you find the perfect match.
45, 60 or 90 min sessions
Choose a 45, 60, or 90-minute session, or a package, providing flexibility and control over the duration and intensity.
12 FAQs about Couples Therapy
What is couples therapy?
Couple therapy is psychotherapy that helps couples resolve conflicts, improve communication and strengthen their relationship. It is suitable for couples in all relationship types and focuses on addressing issues that affect the relationship’s health.
Is couple therapy effective?
Couples’ therapy has proven effective for many couples facing challenges in their relationships, with around 70% of those who attend couples’ therapy experiencing an improved relationship.
How do you know when it’s time to seek couples therapy?
If you are experiencing communication problems, recurring conflicts, emotional distance, stress, or trust issues such as infidelity, it may be time to consider professional help. You may also have intimacy issues or recurring thoughts of separation or divorce.
How does treatment for relationship problems work?
Treatment often starts with an assessment to identify problems and patterns. This is followed by the active treatment phase, where working on tools and strategies to change patterns is central. Finally, there is a closing phase where the treatment is summarized for further work after the therapy.
What are exercises in couple therapy?
Couples therapy uses various exercises to help couples break patterns and develop a better relationship. These include communication, spending time together, and showing gratitude.
What are common questions in couples therapy?
Questions can relate to the current state of the relationship, the challenges faced, and what the couple hopes to achieve from therapy.
Can couples therapy be done online?
All psychologists and therapists at Lavendla offer remote therapy.
What is the therapist’s role in therapy?
The therapist leads the process, helps the couple identify patterns and challenges, and develops strategies for changing communication and behaviours to make the relationship more satisfying.
What is IBCT?
IBCT (Integrative Behavioral Therapy for Couples) is an evidence-based therapy that combines behavioural changes with acceptance strategies to help couples accept their differences and work on increasing closeness and understanding by improving emotional acceptance and empathic communication.
What is EFT?
EFT (Emotionally Focused Therapy) is an evidence-based therapy that focuses on building and strengthening the emotional bond between couples by exploring and reshaping the negative patterns of interaction that contribute to conflict and distance in the relationship.
My partner has mental health issues. Can we go to couples therapy?
If you have problems with depression or other mental health issues such as addiction, it is essential to seek help for this separately from couples therapy. These problems often must be addressed before or simultaneously as couples therapy to get a good result.
Where can I seek help?
If you want to go to therapy, we recommend contacting a trained psychologist or therapist who works with couples. You can book a first appointment with one of our therapists here at Lavendla. We make the hard easier.
Treatment for relationship problems with Integrative Behavioral Couples Therapy (IBCT)
Integrative Behavioural Couples Therapy (IBCT) is an evidence-based form of couple therapy that aims to help couples improve their relationship by accepting each other and increasing the couple’s emotional closeness. IBCT combines traditional behavioural therapy techniques with a focus on change and acceptance. Here is how a treatment with IBCT usually works:
Initial phase
- Assessment: Treatment begins with thoroughly assessing the couple’s relationship, including their current problems, relationship history, and each party’s perspectives and experiences.
- Feedback session: The therapist provides feedback based on the initial assessment. This phase often includes discussions about the couple’s strengths and areas that need development.
Work phase
- Focus on acceptance: IBCT emphasizes accepting unbridgeable differences between partners. The therapist works with the couple to help them understand and empathically accept each other’s needs, desires, and patterns of behaviour that cannot be easily changed.
- Emotional closeness: The therapist helps the couple increase their emotional closeness and understanding by encouraging openness and communication.
- Behaviour change: Although the focus is on acceptance, IBCT also includes strategies for behaviour change. This may involve developing new communication skills, solving problems, and improving daily interactions.
Closure
- Evaluation of progress: The therapist and the couple evaluate the progress made during therapy and discuss any future steps or continued support.
IBCT focuses on helping couples develop a deeper understanding and acceptance of each other, which can lead to a more satisfying and sustainable relationship. By balancing acceptance with active change efforts, IBCT aims to reduce conflict, increase closeness and strengthen the emotional bond between partners.
Read more
